“I went back to the car and cried” – Esteban Ocon opens up about his unexpected year on F1 sidelines

Esteban Ocon has opened up about the 2019 Formula 1 season, which he spent as a Mercedes reserve driver following an unfavourable chain of events.

Back in July 2018, Ocon was riding a wave of momentum. In his second full F1 campaign, the Mercedes protege was narrowly leading seasoned Force India team-mate Sergio Perez in the drivers’ standings, and had just outqualified him seven times in a row – but that didn’t prevent him from ending up on the sidelines.

“It was difficult,” Ocon commented when asked about his growth as a driver that year in Autosport’s latest You Ask The Questions interview.

“It was at Renault that I was supposed to drive, but there was also another team involved at the time. And yeah, with both it created a massive mess-up, I would say, for my year in Formula 1.”

Ocon’s performance at the time led Mercedes to consider him as a potential replacement for Valtteri Bottas alongside Lewis Hamilton in 2019, but with both Renault and McLaren expressing interest in the 21-year-old, Mercedes team principal Toto Wolff awarded Bottas a new contract, which was made official on 20 July.

Meanwhile, Ocon went to the McLaren Technology Centre for a seat fit ahead of the German Grand Prix (20-22 July) in case he might be asked to replace Stoffel Vandoorne halfway through 2018 ahead of a full-season move.

Renault committed to Ocon and insisted his negotiations with McLaren stop, but eventually picked Ricciardo instead

Photo by: Mark Thompson / Getty Images

However, Renault prevailed in the race to sign the Frenchman. A handshake reportedly occurred, but the contract was never signed. When it emerged that Daniel Ricciardo wanted to leave Red Bull, Renault team boss Cyril Abiteboul didn’t think twice and snapped up the eight-time grand prix winner. Both Ricciardo’s Red Bull exit and his Renault deal were announced on 3 August.

In the meantime, McLaren had been informed that Ocon wouldn’t be available, so the Woking-based squad had got into advanced negotiations with Carlos Sainz to join rookie Lando Norris in its 2019 line-up – as Red Bull picked Pierre Gasly to fill the vacant spot alongside Max Verstappen.

That is how Ocon ended up spending the campaign as Mercedes’ reserve driver.

“It was a tough year, that one,” the current Haas driver continued. “I was not happy, of course, to be where I was. I was developing a car during the night, and doing the job of two reserve drivers, I was doing it by myself – they later had two or three drivers doing the job I was doing, so that's how much commitment I was putting in.

Ocon got limited testing opportunities with Mercedes, despite a Goodwood run

Photo by: Mark Thompson / Getty Images

“Basically that car then, when I was coming to the track, was winning races, but I was not inside the seat. So it was tough, especially when I asked Shov [trackside engineering director Andrew Shovlin], I think in Melbourne, I asked him, ‘When am I supposed to test?’, because I was supposed to have a lot of testing. And he said, ‘Oh, you are going to test in July’ or something, so it was three or four months from March to July, I was supposed to test in Ricard.

“I remember I went back to the rental car and I cried, because for me driving was going to be super important to get ready for the following year, so that year for me was like, stay active, try and drive as much as you can in whatever cars it is, and take as much technical feedback as you can, because they are dominating for when you will come back into the race, that was my aim, but it was long.”

As Lewis Hamilton and Mercedes dominated the world championship, Wolff picked Bottas over Ocon again for 2020. The Frenchman was eventually signed by Renault, this time to join Ricciardo, a move that would yield his maiden and so far only grand prix victory in Hungary the following year. But the rise of George Russell meant he never stood another chance of ever racing a Silver Arrow.